“You can hear it if you listen closely, a pulsating beat through the dark and narrow, rigid alley ways of Richmond, Virginia. As the sun dwindles, the manifestation begins. The sound of deep thumping fills the angsty core with an uncontrollable urge to suit up, for the sole purpose of ripping it all off later. The dirty city nightlife is not for the faint of heart, as so they say.
The weekend is a myth, a legendary firebird in which we ride upon its wings and call ourselves weekend warriors. Our villain, “The Giant Richmond Dance Party Squid”, towers over the night skyline with tentacles stretching all over the Fan and down to the depths of Shockoe bottom. It feeds on the so called, “21+”. The only way to defeat this overgrown mollusk is by all out dancing: Dancing, boogieing, grooving, rocking out, and twerking, and twerking and twerking and twerking. Ask yourself; Am I twerking hard or hardly twerking?
As folklore has it, the wicked James River emits toxic gases on Thursday evenings, transforming aimless young adults into rampant, thirsty zombies. Thus, preparation has commenced, and for those who dare to dance, a vital guide to combat the infamous, weekend beast known as “THE RICHMOND DANCE PARTY.” Consider yourselves fortunate, and take this as your trusted nightlife Necronomicon”